Hello Everyone,
Please see our attached E-press with information about incorporating protective factors in supervised visitation and excerpts from our Divorce and Separation Supervised Visitation Manual Chapter.
| QUESTIONS FROM DIRECTORS
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We are seeking funding from a community foundation to support our supervised visitation program. The foundation wants us to talk about outcomes. Can you give us ideas for outcomes?
If you are looking for outcomes other than the issues we discussed on the phone conference last month (safety, parental attitudes, services), I can suggest outcomes based specifically on the six “protective factors” that we have been training supervised visitation program staff on for the last three years. When you use the strategies we have provided, then your practice is grounded in the research that indicates that families who have protective factors present tend to have less child abuse and better stability. Do you remember the trainings and E books we have been using? Those all include strategies for every factor, and each is geared to practices that can be translated well at supervised visitation. Here are the ebooks.
http://familyvio.csw.fsu.edu/clearinghouse/manuals-and-materials/
Now think about organizing these strategies into specific activities for intake and visits. Also think about how the custodian and the visitor BOTH often need help strengthening those factors. I have included a review of one protective factor below. I have also added a way for you to think about each strategy with our tools.
We will discuss this at the next phone conference. You can easily tie outcomes to each of these factors.
Incorporating Protective Factors in Supervised Visitation
There are six protective factors that have been identified to reduce the likelihood of violence within a family. The protective factors help to create strong families and visitation monitors can contribute to the development of protective factors during the visitation process. Attached is an intake form for a visiting parent and custodial parent with actions for each protective factor listed. Monitors can complete these actions or develop their own actions to incorporate protective factors into their interactions with families. In addition, the follow-up forms attached will assist monitors in providing information and coaching for parents throughout the visitation process.
Here are the resources listed for visits
Emotional Intelligence Handout – http://familyvio.csw.fsu.edu/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/Emotional-Intelligence-Handouts.pdf
Tips for Controlling Your Anger – http://familyvio.csw.fsu.edu/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/Tips-for-Controlling-your-Anger-in-Parenting-1.pdf
Catching the Good and Praising Your Child – http://familyvio.csw.fsu.edu/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/Catching-the-Good-and-Praising-Your-Child_final-1.pdf
Family Skill Builder – http://familyvio.csw.fsu.edu/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/FamilySkillBuilder.pdf
Building Blocks of Parenting – http://familyvio.csw.fsu.edu/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/building_blocks_poster.pdf
Economic Friendly Activities for Families – http://familyvio.csw.fsu.edu/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/EconomicFriendlyActivities.pdf
Every Child is Smart – http://familyvio.csw.fsu.edu/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/Every_Child_is_Smart_small.pdf
Role Playing Emotions with Children – http://familyvio.csw.fsu.edu/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/Role-playing-Emotions-with-Children_final.pdf
| REMINDERS FOR INTAKE
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| Visiting Parent Protective Factor Intake | ||
| Protective Factor | Action | Date |
| Nurturing and Attachment | Inform parent about the importance of being present in the child’s life and spending time with their child | |
| Ask parent about his or her child’s interests and how to play during visitation | ||
| Provide parent with Emotional Intelligence Handout to practice management of frustration and anger | ||
| Provide parent with Tips for Controlling Negative Emotions in Parenting Handout | ||
| Discuss how parent can praise his or her child and provide tips from Catching the Good and Praising Your Child Handout | ||
| Knowledge of Child’s Developmental Stages | Discuss the child’s age, expectations for that age, and what behaviors may present during visitation | |
| Talk with parent about the different activities the program has available and what activities will be most age-appropriate for visits with the child | ||
| Provide parent with the Family Skill Builder and discuss typical behaviors and interactions for children in his or her child’s age range. | ||
| Discuss age-appropriate consequences and punishments for children | ||
| Parental Resilience | Identify parent’s stress triggers | |
| Suggest positive coping skills and activities for parent to participate in to relax. | ||
| Provide parent with The Building Blocks of Parenting: Repairing and Enhancing the Parent-Child Relationship Handout | ||
| Supportive Social Connections | Parent identifies friends, neighbors, or acquaintances in his or her life who help them in times of need | |
| Look for barriers to social involvement for the parent (child care, transportation, or self-confidence) | ||
| Encourage parent to meet new people in the community | ||
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| Access to Concrete Community Supports | Ask parent what his or her specific needs are | |
| Provide parent with referrals to agencies that meet those needs and in which the parent meets the qualifications | ||
| Let parent know about free resources in the community (free arts and crafts night, movie in the park, free health screenings, etc.) | ||
| Social and Emotional Competence of Children | Discuss what a safe environment for visitation looks like with the parent. | |
| Ask parent how he or she deals with emotions such as anger, sadness, or frustration | ||
| Provide parents with the Emotional Intelligence Handouts to practice modeling healthy emotion management before visitation | ||
| Custodial Parent Protective Factor Intake | ||
| Protective Factor | Action | Date |
| Nurturing and Attachment | Inform parent about the importance of spending time with their child | |
| Ask and encourage parent to become involved in his or her | ||
| Provide parent with Economic-Friendly Activities for Families to find ways to spend time with children | ||
| Discuss how parent can praise his or her child and provide tips from Catching the Good and Praising Your Child Handout | ||
| Knowledge of Child’s Developmental Stages | Discuss the child’s age, expectations for that age, and what behaviors are typical for his or her age group | |
| Provide parent with the Every Child is Smart Handout | ||
| Inform parent of age-appropriate activities in the community that his or her child can try or join. | ||
| Discuss age-appropriate consequences and punishments for children | ||
| Parental Resilience | Inform parent of any free resources for physical health or medical services (yoga at the community center, free physicals at the clinic) | |
| Suggest positive coping skills and activities for parent to participate in to relax. | ||
| Discuss parts of life that cause stress and recommend resources to help reduce that stress (low-cost child care services) | ||
| Supportive Social Connections | Help parent identify friends, neighbors, or acquaintances in his or her life who help them in times of need | |
| Look for barriers to social involvement for the parent (child care, transportation, or self-confidence) | ||
| Encourage parent to meet new people in the community and refer him or her to community events | ||
| Talk with parent about who they turn to for support, advice, or help | ||
| Access to Concrete Community Supports | Ask parent what his or her specific needs are | |
| Provide parent with referrals to agencies that meet those needs and in which the parent meets the qualifications | ||
| Let parent know about free resources in the community (free arts and crafts night, movie in the park, free health screenings, etc.) | ||
| Find out if there is anything that you must do to help parent in accessing services | ||
| Social and Emotional Competence of Children | Discuss how the parent feels about discussing emotions with his or her child | |
| Ask parent how he or she deals with emotions such as anger, sadness, or frustration | ||
| Provide parent with Role Playing Emotions with Children HanHaHHHHandout | ||
| Ask parent about his or her feelings and child’s feelings | ||
| MATERIALS FOR VISITS
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| Visiting Parent Checklist | |||||
| Protective Factor | Action | Date | Date | Date | Date |
| Nurturing and Attachment | Encourage parent to express warmth and love to his or her child | ||||
| Allow child to lead in play and encourage parent to follow | |||||
| Coach parent through unfamiliar situations when child is frustrated, upset, or sad and needs comfort | |||||
| Discuss how parent can praise his or her child and provide tips from Catching the Good and Praising Your Child Handout | |||||
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| Knowledge of Child’s Developmental Stages | Identify a goal from The Family Skill Builder to work on | ||||
| Suggest an appropriate activity for the visit | |||||
| Let parent know that his or her child’s behavior is “normal” in development | |||||
| Intervene if parent has unrealistic expectations | |||||
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| Parental Resilience | Remind parent that he or she is strong and resilient for participating in visitation | ||||
| If parent becomes frustrated or upset, encourage parent to walk away and take a deep breath | |||||
| Discuss how to reduce stress and use coping skills during and outside of visitation | |||||
| Ask about parent’s health and how he or she stays physically and emotionally healthy | |||||
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| Supportive Social Connections | Encourage parent to seek or join a support group | ||||
| Look for barriers to social involvement for the parent (child care, transportation, or self-confidence) | |||||
| Encourage parent to meet new people in the community and refer him or her to a community event | |||||
| Talk with parent about who they turn to for support, advice, or help | |||||
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| Access to Concrete Community Supports | Check-in with parent on needs or any new issues | ||||
| Inform parent of any new resources that may be time sensitive (Tax-free week, free vaccinations, etc.) | |||||
| Let parent know about events and resources in the community (free arts and crafts night, movie in the park, free health screenings, etc.) | |||||
| Follow-up with parent on previous referrals that you gave | |||||
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| Social and Emotional Competence of Children | Encourage parent to listen and actively play with child | ||||
| Model positive reactions to children when they communicate emotions | |||||
| Provide parent with Role Playing Emotions with Children HanHaHHHHandout | |||||
| Ask parent about his or her feelings and child’s feelings | |||||
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| Custodial Parent Checklist | |||||
| Protective Factor | Action | Date | Date | Date | Date |
| Nurturing and Attachment | Remind parent to show affection when leaving and greeting his or her child at visitation | ||||
| Encourage parent to listen to his or her child when talking about visits etc. | |||||
| Provide parent with Top 10 Strategies to Facilitate Child Communication | |||||
| Follow-up with parent on resources, handouts, or actions completed at intake | |||||
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| Knowledge of Child’s Developmental Stages | Remind parent of ways that he or she can support child in new activities | ||||
| Provide parent with information on child’s age group and development | |||||
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| Parental Resilience | Remind parent that he or she is strong and resilient, provide parent with 10 Things Parents Do Great | ||||
| Acknowledge parent when he or she makes it through a challenging time | |||||
| Remind parent to use self-care and coping skills | |||||
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| Supportive Social Connections | Check-in with parent on barriers to receiving support | ||||
| Inform parent of support groups and programs in the community | |||||
| Encourage parent to meet new people in the community and refer him or her to a community event | |||||
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| Access to Concrete Community Supports | Check-in with parent on needs or any new issues | ||||
| Inform parent of any new resources that may be time sensitive (Tax-free week, free vaccinations, etc.) | |||||
| Let parent know about events and resources in the community (free arts and crafts night, free health screenings) | |||||
| Follow-up with parent on previous referrals that you gave | |||||
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| Social and Emotional Competence of Children | Inform parent of new films or books that express the importance of emotional management | ||||
| Follow-up with parent on emotional intelligence | |||||
| Ask parent about his or her feelings and child’s feelings | |||||
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Developing Protective Factors: Knowledge of Child’s Developmental Stages
By Caroline Johnson
Introduction
Identifying a child’s developmental stage is considered to be one of six protective factors that reduces violence within a family. Knowledge of the different child’s developmental stages starts with parent’s understanding their children’s physical, emotional, and mental needs. Research shows how important it is for parents to be knowledgeable of their child’s developments and how it leads to reduced risk for child maltreatment, neglect, and abuse. Gaining knowledge of a child’s developmental stages allows for parents to fulfill their children’s needs while during infancy, toddler, school-aged, teenage, and adulthood stages. The information from this E-Press will help parents gain an understanding of the developmental stages. Supervised visitation providers will also be able to help parents be more aware of the importance of child’s developmental stages as a protective factor in visitation.
Objectives
This E-press will provide the following information on the knowledge of a child’s developmental stages:
- The importance of understanding developmental stages in children
- Effects on children and parents
- Examples of appropriate developmental stages
- How supervised visitation providers can help parents
- Resources for more information on child developmental stages
The Importance of Knowing a Child’s Developmental Stages
When parents understand appropriate milestones for their children, there is no confusion on children’s behavior. The risk of parents getting angry and acting violent towards their children is significantly reduced when there is knowledge of the developmental stages. Parents who are aware of their child’s developmental stage will make their children feel more secure and encouraged. Also, if a parent notices his or her child is not reaching appropriate milestones for their age this could allow for parents to access early interventions if necessary.
Effects on Children and Parents
The following is a list of the positive effects for both children and parents when there is knowledge of a child’s developmental factors. It is helpful to know how this protective factor effects all families.
- The parents will have realistic expectations of children.
- Children will know what their parents expect of them.
- Parents will be able to choose age appropriate activities for their child.
- A child feels that he or she is able to achieve and learn new things.
| Examples of a parent that does NOT understand developmental stages:
· A mother yells at her infant for not listening or following directions · Parents allows their 5 year old to supervise their infant |
- Based on why the child could be upset, the parent will know how to appropriately respond and assist the child.
- The parent will understand the children’s limitations and will know how to better help achieve their goals.
- Children will feel supported and loved by their parents.
- Parents will know if the child is not reaching certain developmental milestones.
Examples of Appropriate Developmental Stages (0-5 years)
Listed below are a few examples of age appropriate behaviors. This information is based off of the average child, which means that some children may reach milestones before or after the listed age. However, these examples will allow for parents to be able to expect certain behaviors from their children.
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Ages & Stages |
Appropriate Behaviors |
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Infants/babies (0-2 years old) |
· 4 months – Can hold head up, randomly smiles, and begins to babble.
· 1 year – Can play “peak-a-boo”, can wave bye, says “mama” and “dada”, and may stand alone.
· 2 years – Talks, repeats words, can kick a ball, and starts to run. |
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Toddlers/Preschoolers (2-5 years old) |
· 3 years – Dresses & undresses self, can name most familiar things, climbs well, and runs easily.
· 4 years – Engages in make believe play, understands counting, & can mostly catch a bouncing ball.
· 5 years – Speaks clearly, can print some numbers and letters, & can use the toilet independently. |
How Visitation Monitors Can Help
It is vital for supervised visitation monitors to be aware of the appropriate developmental milestones for children. Knowledge of child development for supervised visitation personnel is important because when parents are unaware of this information, the monitors can inform parents of appropriate developmental behaviors and assist in establishing this protective factor. Listed below are examples of opportunities for supervised visitation providers to help parents be more aware of the different developmental stages.
- During intake. Before the visit begins, the supervised visitation monitor and the parent can discuss the child and the current behaviors that are exhibited. The supervised visitation provider can explain to the parent where the child should be developmentally by giving examples of appropriate behavior.
- During the visit. While during the visit the supervised visitation provider can encourage the parent to choose appropriate activities for the child to play with. This allows for the child to understand and enjoy the activity chosen.
- If the child becomes upset. Coach parent through the situation to find out why the child is upset and how this is related to where they are developmentally. The supervised visitation monitor can then provide support to best handle the situation.
- If the parent is upset with the child. Remind parent that behavior may be related to the child’s developmental stage. The parent might not understand why the child is acting a certain way if they do not understand the developmental stages.
Conclusion
Understanding a child’s developmental factors is essential for all parents. The information, resources, and developmental examples from this E-press will allow for both parents and supervised visitation monitors be able to assist children in feeling more understood and supported.
Resources & References
Beardslee, W.R., Avery, M.W., Ayoub, C. C., Watts, C.L., & Lester, P. (2010). Building resilience. Zero to Three. Retrieved from: http://www.zerotothree.org/maltreatment/31-1- prac-tips-beardslee.pdf
Center on the Social and Emotional Foundations for Early Learning. Resources: Family Tools. Retrieved from http://csefel.vanderbilt.edu/resources/family.html
Child Development Institute. Normal Stages of Human Development (Birth to 5 Years). Retrieved from: http://childdevelopmentinfo.com/child-development/normaldevelopment/
Florida State University Autism Institute. Which Children Should We be Concerned About. Retrieved from http://firstwords.fsu.edu/providers.htm
Institute for Family Violence Studies. The Protective Factors an E-Book Series for Supervised Visitation Programs, Knowledge of Child Development. Retrieved from http://familyvio.csw.fsu.edu/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/ProtectiveFactor2.pdf
(2016). Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Developmental Milestones. Retrieved from http://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/actearly/milestones/
Zero to Three National Center for Infants, Toddlers, and Families. Ages and Stages. Retrieved from http://www.zerotothree.org/parenting-resources/ages-and-stages.html